I so used to. My favorite thing to tell myself after a binge—or even just a small misstep—was, “Screw it. I already messed up anyway, so why not keep eating?” That seems to be a pretty common thought process for people like us. In fact, I’ve heard women in my support group call it getting a case of “the f*ck-its” because you overeat and then say, “f*ck it!” and binge your face off, making yourself feel ten time worse.
But, I have a hopeful little story to share that inspired this post: I ate more than I needed to yesterday—a bite of pumpkin bread here, a few spiced nuts there—something that would’ve totally triggered the “I messed up, so screw it” mindset in me a few years ago. That one day of less-than-ideal eating would’ve turned into two or three days of free-for-all, ending in a big binge and a promise to go on a strict diet.
But now? My attitude has changed so much that instead of spiraling into a vicious overeating cycle I just…went back to normal. I woke up this morning and had good breakfast, as usual. Then I had a good, normal lunch. With no lingering guilt. And that—banishing the guilt—is the key, I think.
I don’t think I’m BAD because I ate too much food yesterday. I don’t even think that eating too much food yesterday was BAD. It’s just not ideal for my every day life and I’d rather not do it too often. Letting go of that black and white thinking which used to tell me that some foods are evil and some ways of eating are evil and learning to stop attaching that label to myself (“I ate too much bad food, therefore I am bad”) has allowed me to grow into a healthier, more balanced, infinitely more pleasant relationship with food and my body. Wow!
I used to think that kind of balanced attitude would be impossible for me to attain. Shows you what a few years of (yes, hard at times) work can do for a girl. What I want to know from you guys today is, how do you react when you “mess up” with food? Are you stuck in the vicious cycle? What can you do to break out of it?